But seriously folks! The word "Calamari" derives from the Greek "kalamos" for "pen" and the Latin "calamarium" for "pen case"-referencing the translucent, tapered internal shell and ink sac vou'll find in species like the california market squid Doryteuthis (formerly Loligo)!

This pen+ink sac combo can be used for writing, if only during an invertebrate zoology lab session-though if a squid used it to sign a check, it'd be proof that they have the quills to pay the bills!