“The Indians, knowing the bat was indeed corked, dispatched relief pitcher Jason Grimsley to retrieve the bat. Grimsley took a bat belonging to Indians player Paul Sorrento and accessed the area above the false ceiling in the clubhouse and crawled across with a flashlight in his mouth until he reached the umpires' room. He switched Belle's bat with Sorrento's and returned to the clubhouse”
Roid rage? More like Roid brain
"And strike three! Johnson is out! But what's this? HE HAS STOLEN THE UMPIRES ACCESS CARD! What a fine display of pick pocketing by Johnson. He's on his way to the umpires locker, but he's intercepted by security! How will he talk his way out of this one?"