not this again

  • MerryChristmas [any]
    ·
    2 years ago

    One time my friend walked into the grocery store and went straight back to the lobster tank, grabbed a live one, shoved it under his shirt and walked right back out. I used to be on valium so I'm not stranger to the five finger discount, but nothing could prepare me for the swagger with which he pulled off that heist.

      • MerryChristmas [any]
        ·
        2 years ago

        It's a real story but I understand why you wouldn't believe me. It was surreal to see such a display of existential freedom.

    • GaveUp [she/her]
      ·
      edit-2
      2 years ago

      I used to be on valium so I’m not stranger to the five finger discount

      Wait what? I have not heard of this stereotype with valium before. Are benzo users stereotyped to be robbers? I thought all you guys do is just literally pass out and do nothing

      • Des [she/her, they/them]
        ·
        2 years ago

        benzo blackouts. and especially with the research chemical classes of analogs that are big now since many of them don't produce any noticeable psychoactive effects until suddenly bam.. you black out and wake up 24 hours later

      • Heifer [none/use name]
        ·
        2 years ago

        You haven’t had a bartard steal your PlayStation and while openly holding it say he would never do such a thing

      • MerryChristmas [any]
        ·
        edit-2
        2 years ago

        It's a thing! You don't feel drunk so you're operating under a false sense of sobriety. Your inhibitions are still lower, though, and there isnt that voice in your head saying "you might regret this when you're sober."

        Back in the 90s, there was even a short-lived moral panic after a bunch of celebrities got popped for shoplifting on what was often referred to as "mommy's little helper." If you were a young mother and you told a doctor you were stressed, the solution at the time was to sedate you and send you back to your kids.