This morning:

Daddy come see my poop. My poop is long and pointy.

The Gary Peterson acct is fake but really funny.

I like WOMEN!

Oh.

Why is this news, everyone dines sooner or later.

Very cool, didn’t know it could do that

I guess I don’t use either because no one I know does. A few friends and I have a signal group chat but other than that 🤷

My youngest continues to be super sweet to everyone. I love seeing the person he’s becoming.

Yeah our first slept with us until ~2.5. Started by having him do naps in his own bed with me sitting there. (This was during covid lockdowns). Then it was me sleeping with him at night and gradually transitioning into him getting to sleep without me being in the room. Really liked the book It’s Never Too Late to Sleep Train.

Oh damn thanks for pointing this out! Michael Rosen has written a bunch of great kids books. I got the audiobook (it’s like $2 on audible rn) to listen to with my kids and will look for a print copy.

Logging in to say:

• rest in piss
• fuck you Henry

Thanks!

Oh goddamnit I was thinking about blippy. My bad.

Lol I hear you on that. The Utah Philips song Kids Liberation is probably just as good and not a downer tbh.

Oh yeah for sure, check out the book Childism on that score. Fucking brutal read.

Parents see their kids as that proverbial lump of clay that they can/should master and shape. Everyone else is misformed and can be disregarded. But I think the motivation has to do with success/outcomes. Parents own neurosis also come into play.

The more I think about it the more I have come to realize how beautifully American Goodfellas is. Fuck you, pay me is the only ONLY way to respond to our culture.

Tell me more about your human capital you leach.

So many adults see children (including their own) as obstacles to “success” (access to resources) and they just want the bad elements excised. Cynicism sucks.

We don’t give him enough credit for how funny he is. Trump’s humor is Gallagher, Biden is a little comic you may not have heard of: Bill Hicks.

When I was an elementary school teacher one year a student had a really, really hard time. Not for nothing; homeless family, sole caregiver with addition problems, etc. Student was doing lots of acting out at school.

PTA parents: Call the cops.

HE’S NINE FUCKING YEARS OLD! FUCK YOU! FUCK YOU! FUCK YOU!

When he (or his sister, who had equally big meltdowns but a had better classroom teacher) they’d just come to my room and chill out. Sit under my desk, sit on my lap for a hug and cry, whatever.

Fuck everyone and anyone who wants to put children in handcuffs. First against the fucking wall as far as I’m concerned.

How old’s your baby? (And congratulations!) As baby gets older, may be easier.

FWIW could some of this also be your partner just needing/wanting to feel that you’re “present” for them more?

Also definitely be stoned at work and steal whatever you can (safely).

Yeah I am not a big fan of him. The firefighter episode where we get to watch him doing reps on the exercise machine is a low point.

I make my kids mainline Mr Rogers.