My grandfather gave me some dilapidated house in some place called Stardew something. It was a dump so I stayed at my job at Joja corporate. Some guy named Pierre wanted to buy it for like a fraction of what it was worth, real predatory guy. Last I checked it was infested with some sort weird bug. It almost sounded like it could talk, the weirdest things. Sometimes, I think about visiting, just out of curiosity, but then the quarterly reports come due, and keep forgetting about it. Recently, Pierre’s emails has gone from predatory lowball offers to ranting about the 'soul of the valley' and how my land is supposedly pivotal to some community revival fantasy. Honestly, if the bugs are half as persistent as Pierre, maybe they deserve to inherit the place.
Huh, I always thought you were Ed from division 5. They keep things so tight lipped around here it's always hard to tell. Our weekly entrapment quota has turned into drinks at the bar with coworkers so frequently they revoked our slush fund and we have to bring six packs.