Never work in a nursing home.

  • Bluegrass_Buddhist [none/use name]
    ·
    edit-2
    3 years ago

    I'm helping take care of my elderly relatives, some of whom have been absolutely devastated by dementia and Alzheimer's. Every day for them is scary, confusing and frustrating. At one point my great-grandma woke up screaming because she had it in her head that she was still 12 years old (actually 91) and couldn't understand why she couldn't move her legs or why her skin looked so craggy.

    I'll say it again: I 1000% unironically hope that before the U.S. crumbles and all the silicon valley billionaires take off for Elysium that they'll figure out effective anti- or reverse aging treatments. Or at least some way to reverse brain deterioration. Say what you want about death, but aging is a universal curse; a debilitating disease that needs to be cured like any other.

    No one deserves to go through the kind of hell my relatives, or the person who made this drawing, are currently going through.

    • happybadger [he/him]
      hexagon
      ·
      3 years ago

      My condolences comrade. Caretaking for a condition like that is an impossible burden and it's equally impossible to separate the person from the disorder. It completely poisoned my relationship with my grandparents until I could accept that they died the day they were diagnosed. The systems that force it should be burned to the ground along with everyone responsible for such barbarism.

      • Bluegrass_Buddhist [none/use name]
        ·
        3 years ago

        :meow-hug: Thank you, and condolences and solidarity to you too. I've accepted that the people who helped raised me are effectively already gone, but it's still hard to see them struggling and know it's only going to get worse.

        • happybadger [he/him]
          hexagon
          ·
          3 years ago

          You're giving them a level of rehumanisation they wouldn't have in a nursing home. That's the best anyone could ask for given the circumstances. There's absolutely no shame in taking that step for their own protection when your own abilities are exhausted but either way you're protecting them at their most vulnerable moment.

          • Bluegrass_Buddhist [none/use name]
            ·
            3 years ago

            We're getting close with my great-grandma, she'll have to go into a medicaid facility sometime next year if she lives that long; we already had to sell her house back to the bank in order to pay for all her medical expenses.

            Thank you for the kind words, for real. And godspeed to you too; I can't imagine doing this type of work professionally. :fidel-salute-big:

        • mojo [they/them]
          ·
          3 years ago

          Alzheimer's is a curse like no other, you have my solidarity. I grew up with my grandmother having early onset Alzheimer's and she moved in with us in the final years when I a teen. I didn't realize how it effected me until I spent some time processing years later. She was an amazing woman who dedicated her life to advocating for Alzheimer's after her diagnosis but I only ever got glimpses of that growing up. Some of my earliest memories with her are when she would "give me the talk" that she had Alzheimer's several times a day and I couldn't say anything because I didn't want to hurt more. Best of luck to you.

    • Mardoniush [she/her]
      ·
      3 years ago

      I know. I had a friend die recently. They went relatively quick and with the best palliative care money can buy in a country where you don't have to pay unless you want the gold plating. It was a "good death" by modern healthcare standards.

      But no matter what they say and how much drugs you have in your nice room, it's bad. The body always tries to live, and what we know about the rate of coma patients having some awareness doesn't give me comfort about what the final moments feel like.

      For a less gruesome example. He was around music his whole life, but in the last week, he was so sound sensitive he couldn't handle so much as a lullaby. Fucking shattering.

      Fuck death, find the grim reaper and impale him on a sickle and smash his head in with the hammer.