When I really got into leftist thought about a decade ago I came across a very sincere idea that we have to be better. That part of building a new and more equal society starts with the self. That doesn't mean letting people walk over you, stick to your principles. But it means being cruel isn't the way to go about it. I'll be mean to chuds all day. But I won't be cruel to the uninformed that can be won over. So I try to be polite, be sincere, and be kind. Until somebody proves they are an asshole. Then I'll be mean. Sort of cultivate a "warrior monk" mindset as cringe as that might sound. We have to be better as a proof of concept for our beliefs.