• roux [he/him, they/them]
    ·
    edit-2
    2 months ago

    We survived the scout camping trip and we both actually seemed to have a lot of fun. I learned real quick that I want a mat for my sleeping bad for next time. Sleeping on the ground is not fun when you are 41. I didn't quite fill out my bingo card but:

    1. First thing thing Saturday morning, I tried making small talk and some guy said Disney+ was nothing but "leftwing content" now, (which is the terminally offline way of saying "woke".
    2. Someone I shall refer to as Uncle Grandpa(he was an actual grandpa to a few kids but was very much that uncle stereotype) told the same story about getting lost going to the camp site like 4 times in 15 minutes, even though it's a straight drive. I can't dog him too much on that since I'm not great with directions though. He also commented on my protein bar and said that he's diabetic, like 3 times.
    3. Uncle Grandpa blamed the uptick of ADHD diagnoses on "all the sugar theses kids are eating" and called it "that attention disorder whatever they are calling it now".
    4. Uncle Grandpa has a naked lady tattoo on his leg and was around a bunch of K through 5th graders.
    5. Uncle Grandpa decided to give his unsolicited opinions on pedophilia, in the middle of a 3 mile hike, unprovoked. This is one of the things that really bugged me the most since I know he wasn't meaning to be crass about it but it was uncalled for around a bunch of kids.
    6. When we went on the hike, we split into 2 groups, K-2nd grade and then the older kids. The older kid group went on a harder hiking path and got lost/stranded but could see camp. They were stuck on top of a mesa. We sent a couple of the leaders to rescue them, they got stuck, located them but couldn't get to them. We got a hold of the ranger who went and rescued both parties and they all made it back safely at 7:30 last night. No one was hurt, and they were all in good spirits.
    7. Where we were camped, there was red dirt literally everywhere and all the kids played in it, got it everywhere else and it's a never ending torrent of this fine red dirt. I wiped my kid down 4 times before finally giving up. Currently washing all of our clothes.
    8. 2 people talked about how bad diet soda was while cramming their face full of mini chocolate cupcakes.
    9. My son's school friend was there and I think he got bit by something, because he was sobbing in pain and his face looked swollen from an allergic reaction. His parents marked it up as him probably faking it.
    10. My kid cut his finger and with how he was reacting, I thought he broke his arm or something. We bandaged it up but after an hour, he was fine. It was a cut from a blade of grass similar to a paper cut so it def probably hurt.
    11. Throughout the day there was some casual misogyny/misandry jokes but it was all in fun and I expected it somewhat since this group is a lot of religious conservative parents. Nothing was meant in malice but I think it's a reflection on how far left I've come when I am put off by that sort of thing.
    12. I was doing great masking until I met Carlos and we talked about my web dev project and he works for a small ISP in town so he knows some tech stuff. He said it sounds like I know more about networking than some of the people he works with(lol...). I gave my business card to him and the scout master because they had said they know people that might want/need a website.
    13. "Why aren't you eating the tacos." "I don't eat meat." and then hilarity(not really) ensued. A kid did say vegans sound annoying and that made me laugh.

    At the end, I actually had fun. I sort of just tried my best to mask and dissociated occasionally. I did roll my eyes when they all were laughing at Israel's pager/walkie talkie terrorist attacks, praising them for their overt fascism, etc etc.

    • RedWizard [he/him, comrade/them]
      hexagon
      M
      ·
      2 months ago

      Uncle Grandpa sounds like a hoot. I'd love to tell him I got my ADHD diagnosis at 28 because the school systems and my parents thought I was just a lazy shithead. Just to see how that conversation unfolds.

        • roux [he/him, they/them]
          ·
          2 months ago

          Ngl, the sugar narrative grinds my gears. I have ASD but my wife and oldest have ADHD and we are are all suffering. Blaming it on too much sugar or vaccines is fucking bullshit. She has inattentive ADHD too and yeah no, it's definitly not related to sugar. "Oh, you don't have the energy to take a shower or fold laundry all last week? Must be all those Hershey Kisses and soda." She does have a sweet tooth though lol.

          • arbitrary@lemmygrad.ml
            ·
            2 months ago

            It makes no sense at all. Though I have read there's some evidence red dye can make symptoms worse? I don't recall it being particularly damning but enough that I was having our toddler avoid it because we suspect she might have ADHD.

            • roux [he/him, they/them]
              ·
              2 months ago

              I've heard the red dye claims from the same people that claim random other foodstuff causes hyperactivity or learning disabilities so until I see concrete evidence, I'm gonna ignore it but I guess keep it in mind. Anecdotally, I got my kid a Big Red soda for the ride home this morning and he's done really well today and hasn't spun in our spinny chair incessantly today like he usually does.

              • arbitrary@lemmygrad.ml
                ·
                2 months ago

                Yeah that's totally fair. It's not something I make a big deal of, more just trying not to buy it when I can help it. I've found myself erring on the side of caution more after having kids.

                I haven't had a big red in ages! Should just be Big Red 40 I guess, ha. You'd think if it did make the ADHD worse it'd be a strong effect so maybe that's why the evidence is mixed.

      • Hexboare [they/them]
        ·
        2 months ago

        Sounds like the classic old man "back in my day... [proceeds to detail a life story that convinces you this guy probably has ADHD/other subject of conversation]"

        • roux [he/him, they/them]
          ·
          2 months ago

          I really couldn't detect any potential undiagnosed ASD but I could see maybe heavily masked inattentive ADHD. I mostly can only pick up on signs for stuff I have experience with. Maybe there is something else there. But heavily masked ADHD might account for how he had have a witty comment for everything. If I had to guess he was late gen X so there is a big possibility there. He did also go on a unprovoked rant about how "everything is bad for us" after vaping in front of the kids when nicotine/alcohol/other is not permitted around the them. He was like "as long as I got my nicotine I'm good to go" referring to the hike, and holding the vape pen up like it was some ambrosia. The main scout leader told him to put it away, then he proceeded to say how even oxygen is harmful to us. Peak entertainment from a nihilistic, jaded perspective.

        • RedWizard [he/him, comrade/them]
          hexagon
          M
          ·
          2 months ago

          Lol probably has a highly accurate and detailed replica of some Midwestern train rail and station from his youth in his basement.

      • roux [he/him, they/them]
        ·
        2 months ago

        Tbh, I grew up around people like him so I got "used" to it. And honestly, he seemed like he means well and he did genuinely help out a ton. He just had that uncle vibe, ya know? It did offend me a bit because I know at least 2 kids there have ADHD, one being my own, and one younger one that was autistic(overheard his mom talking about it because they are having issues with the school system over it). I'm guessing there is maybe 6 more at least that are little undiagnosed NDers.I did mention my autism to a few people but definitely tried to keep it on the downlow.

    • arbitrary@lemmygrad.ml
      ·
      2 months ago

      Glad you had a good time, definitely could've gone way worse it sounds like! Sorry I haven't replied to your other comment from the other week, just haven't had the energy yet.

      • roux [he/him, they/them]
        ·
        2 months ago

        Sorry I haven't replied to your other comment from the other week, just haven't had the energy yet.

        Hey, don't worry about it. Things get busy and we only have so many spoons lol.

        • arbitrary@lemmygrad.ml
          ·
          2 months ago

          Can't get it to send on the original reply so I'll try to send it here:

          Kudos to you for making it work with your partner! Hopefully they come around eventually.

          That's really good for Texas. I lived in San Antonio for 5 years so that blows my mind you have that many options. I left almost a decade ago now though so maybe the scene has changed.

          • roux [he/him, they/them]
            ·
            2 months ago

            I donno if she or the kids will care enough to come over to the V side any time soon but I'm also not sugar-coating(back to sugar lol) things with them when it comes to why I chose to go the vegan route.

            It's funny because I rolled into Texas shortly before it sounds like you were rolling out and there wasn't any real vegan options that I am aware of but I wasn't vegan yet so wasn't actively seeking places out. But also I've heard that San Antonio is completely different from even the big cities in the panhandle. I'm getting to know the girls that run the vegan food truck and I've realized that it's probably almost a fluke that they ended up here. They are essentially anarchist travelers but their but broke down and they ended up in my city, helping out with our local Food Not Bombs. Eventually they decided to just try the food truck thing. But talking to them, they've both worked every shit job you can think of and don't make a lot of money doing this. So it's a bittersweet thing really.

            • arbitrary@lemmygrad.ml
              ·
              2 months ago

              Never spent much time in the panhandle, only drove through part of it when driving to Albuquerque a few times a year. San Antonio at least wasn't as chuddy as the more rural areas but it wasn't far off. I lived in Kerrville and boerne for a bit before moving into San Antonio and that sucked.

              That's definitely bittersweet but pretty cool of them too. Not to romanticize it since I know it's not all fun but I do kind of envy people who are able to not be tied down to one place. Never thought I'd have kids and be living suburban dad life but I'm making the best of it and trying to be a good dad, hopefully succeeding so far. I'd definitely welcome an anarchist vegan food truck in town though

              • roux [he/him, they/them]
                ·
                2 months ago

                I do kind of envy people who are able to not be tied down to one place.

                For real lol. I sometimes day dream about me owning a van or something that is outfitted for living in and just going off by myself. I love my family though and am glad I went this route instead.