Do you keep a shopping list? A personal to-do or reminders list? You should stop because that’s a ritual and rituals are clearly bad.

I mean, no, you should keep the rituals that help you work better and discard the rest. Which is what successful agile teams are already doing.

Kinda comes across as someone complaining about how their company implemented agile. The only thing I can relate to is long sprints around the holidays, which I don’t see as an issue.

I’ve only worked for 20-30 person companies so maybe it’s a corpo thing? The post reads like a list of red flags that would have me looking for a new job pronto.

Seems to be more a problem of shitty management than agile vs waterfall.

Seems to me you've had issues with how people (mis)implement agile in your company, which is a common problem. Managers can't get their heads out of their waterfall ass. Agile's not to blame though, i've worked in teams where it was a breeze to work in scrum and quite helpful, so don't blame the tool.

Put a chimpanzee behind the wheel of a Ferrari and you'll still have problems.

I know this is just a rant but consider this: if your company reverted back to traditional methods, how much of this would be fixed?