(no banana)

damn I wonder what would have happened if I baked a pie with that dough

I made a pie dough last week and forgot about the leftover dough in the fridge. Went to throw it out today because it was moldy but the mold looked and smelled exactly like gorgonzola, meaning I accidentally made a a pie-based blue cheese replacement somehow It might even have been safe to eat if it was really some type of penicillin strain. Probably the combination of butter and flour created a proper environment for the colonization of Penicillium roqueforti, mimicking the fabled origin of Roquefort cheese in which a young pastoralist abandons his mid-day snack of bread and cheese in a cave to chase a fair wench (truly the great discoveries are not made but once) but now I will never know the taste of the forbidden blue cheese

also I got a job today and it's finally at a decent restaurant with ok wages after getting offered the wage equivalent of dog water gruel several places. "oh but we're like a family and it's so fun to be he-" shut ! and give me money! dummbasses!

bro look at my capitalist attack dogs, they don't even know what commerce is anymore

how will they maintain my beautiful fourth reich without even a basic understanding of material reality

Libuary 6th gets hijacked by Azovites, turns into Euromaidan 2.0, the Dems declares Zelensky President of the Ukrainian-American Commonwealth, Trump goes into exile in Donbas and becomes a hardcore Duginist, hires Haz as his grand vizier.

"Good job President 47, now head to the exfiltration point."

why does the tractor have boss music?

They have been hitting him with the heart-attack gun continuously since he started running for President, but because his heart is constantly failing on its own, all the gun is doing is restarting it.

The A stands for

Israeli Tom Cruise rappelling down from the ceiling of the Cum Vault to retrieve the American sperm before it's discovered and potentially corrupting the sacred gene pool.

Trump is a white-hat pedo infiltrating the Cabal and Kamala is a white-hat genocidaire infiltrating the Deep State.

drawn and quartered by 655 million angry maoists each holding a separate fishing wire

"The Man in the High Castle" but instead of finding a book, he finds a phone with access to alternate universe twitter where the US was defeated by the USSR in 1930 and he just malds for 500 pages about having to live in dog-water US-hegemony world

this is actually happening, but QTHESTORMM is just living in a much more interesting parallel universe, kinda jealous tbh

Now watch me hit this dab :beorgegush:

"Folks, I'm telling ya'- Marika, or as I like to call her, "Sleepy Marika", she messed the Elden Ring up real good. No, it's true, she really messed it up. The Lands Between are disgusting now, broken into little pieces, borders left unguarded. Disrespectful. Miquella has a solution, a yuge solution. Making Altus Great Again, I call it... Look he's here now on stage, look how eternally youthful and honest he looks folks! 1000 years of love, people, we're getting rid of the ANTIFA Golden Order losers!"

and she won't even jerk us off properly