Stolen_Stolen_Valor [any]

Me on Thursday: Alright let’s see what the big deal about Dwarf Fortress is, the hexbear nerds have talked me into it.

Me Friday morning at 6am: oh no

Yeah I hate that so much, I’m balding and my facial hair is wild — I keep it clean but I do not trim or style it or anything. Not because I’m lazy, in fact I think shaving is relaxing and feels good, but I just like the way I look with a crazy unkempt beard. Also I literally do not care that I am going bald.

I ether get the “have you tried rogaine?” or “have you done this with your beard?” I just respond with “have you tried shutting the fuck up?” If someone is gonna be rude to me I’m just gonna match their energy.

IMO don’t do any of the cornball shit like trying to sound sick if you aren’t, and do not ask or make it sound like there is any negotiation to be had.

Simply ask to speak to the person who needs to know and when they pick up just “Hey I’m not feeling well I will not be coming in today.” Just state it as fact.

Nobody likes Hunter Biden. Not Liberals, not conservatives, not us. Nobody.

Just like with Trump it’s irony poisoning as a self defense mechanism because the reality of these idiots just being able to fail upwards is bleak as hell.

It’s a gag, no need to overthink it.

Me if I were also in the mall:

I saw a video of a video recently of some obnoxious wannabe YouTuber sticking a camera in a guys face in a shopping mall and the guy just pulled a gun and shot him.

From what I understand he got off on the charges, like the guy didn’t deserve to be shot but I still don’t how to feel about the situation.

Bethesda game quality is getting worse over time not better. Might as well slap another mod on top of Morrowind because thinking ES6 is gonna be good is pure cope.

Player 2 but the controller isn’t even plugged in.

I don’t understand why anyone who’s planning to a walk out undermines their whole strike by announcing it’s going to be one day only.

Like even if you as a group decide you can only afford to do one day, at least make them sweat a little and don’t tell them.

It always seems to be the tech people who do this too, I’ve seen google employees do it a couple of times and a few video game dev studios do it. I’m still proud of them I just don’t get why they announce a one day strike.

I was prepping a character for the DLC but ended up enjoying it again so much I ended up just blasting through the whole game again and just decided I’ll play all of it again when it comes out.

Shaun

In that case play both!

The original but I only say that because the games are so similar and the original still holds up so well it kinda makes the whole sequel an unnecessary cash grab.

If the switch option includes giving $60 to Nintendo then definitely pirate the snes version I beg you

I dunno about the second one but the only other game I’ve ever played where the writing wasn’t absolute drivel is Pillars of Eternity. It’s quite good IMO

What is this question? What if I commit a crime but then do something extremely unusual before the cops arrive?

Pretty sure the answer will be the same. Actually it might be worse because the cops might just execute you if you’re still around when they show up.

You must be extremely unlucky, every doctor I’ve ever had has been either incredibly kind or just outright hilarious or both.

Hello it’s me, an idiot.

I was literally describing myself, but hello coder unit 2711b.

I hate them both I think to myself, not because they are annoying but because they are both infinitely more interesting people than me. The final thought I have as I silence my phone before the standup meeting at my software job with 20 other white dudes who are interchangeable with myself.

Specifically, RealPage employs "pricing advisors" who "meet with landlords to ensure that properties are implementing RealPage’s set rates”

You’re describing price fixing. You are literally describing the crime you are committing.

You either have to be impossibly stupid to do this and/or extremely evil - also confident your government is so broken they won’t come after you with antitrust laws.