The biggest mistake of American cheese is calling it cheese. When you realize what it actually is, a perfectly textured cheese sauce that has been stabilized as to not break or get greasy, formed into a slice-able form factor for ease of deployment, I don't think there is really much to fight about.
Yellow mustard is the only good mustard. That brown stuff may be the "original," but it was only used because they didn't have capsaicin, which is the only good spicy. Fuck that nose burn shit, gimme my smooth mellow yellow mustard. If I want a good burn from my food, I don't want it in my nasal mucous membranes.
Your arguments boil down to reactionary dreams of an imagined mustard past, a stone-ground ideal, yet fail to mention taste even once. You drown in grey poupon propaganda, associating mustard choice as a simulacrum of refinement. You name-drop Baudrillard yet fail to realize that it is YOU who is using mustard as a building block of your own personality.
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Give me colman's or give me death
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Also sausage biscuits. Once I figured that one out I never went back. It makes sense, since hot dogs are basically sausages too.
I now subscribe to Marist-Leninist-Whatever-this-ism
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The biggest mistake of American cheese is calling it cheese. When you realize what it actually is, a perfectly textured cheese sauce that has been stabilized as to not break or get greasy, formed into a slice-able form factor for ease of deployment, I don't think there is really much to fight about.
Yellow mustard is the only good mustard. That brown stuff may be the "original," but it was only used because they didn't have capsaicin, which is the only good spicy. Fuck that nose burn shit, gimme my smooth mellow yellow mustard. If I want a good burn from my food, I don't want it in my nasal mucous membranes.
Your arguments boil down to reactionary dreams of an imagined mustard past, a stone-ground ideal, yet fail to mention taste even once. You drown in grey poupon propaganda, associating mustard choice as a simulacrum of refinement. You name-drop Baudrillard yet fail to realize that it is YOU who is using mustard as a building block of your own personality.
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okay maybe im bad at reading comprehension but at least im not using ableist slurs like calling me a petard smh
The correct term is differently landmined ffs guys.
someone pepper-spray this revisionist until he begs for wasabi
this is mala erasure, gimme that hydroxy-alpha sanshool