All except the "Hexbear is a community of" prompt on the screenshot is AI generated. I am scared of this technology.

  • Yanqui_UXO [any]
    ·
    3 years ago

    Belden's was funnier but this one is truer to life:

    You are a serf. Bitch, you live in Alsace. You are a peasant. You need to give your fuckin’ lord the grain. Your fucking children, you’ve had 15 children. You’ve never taken a bath. You’ve literally never. washed. your. penis. You’ve never used toilet paper. Motherfucker, you have worms. You are dying. You’ve had 40 children, 3 of them are alive. 2 of them are child soldiers in the Crusades. One is a thief, who’s going to be hung, and one is a whore, who’s going to be hung. You’ve had 40 children, only 3 of them are alive. You own a pig. You’re a slave. You’re a serf. You’re a serf. You have a cow. You have a goat. You have a pig. You have a chicken. You have a duck. You have a goose. You have a horse. You have a donkey. You have a wife. You have a son. You have a daughter. You have a mother. You have a father. You have a brother. You have a sister. You have a grandfather. You have a grandmother. You have a nephew. You have a niece. You have a granddaughter. You have a grandson. You have a dog. You have a cat. You have a wife. You have a husband. You have a wife. You have a husband. You have a wife. You have a husband.

    2nd try, lol wtf:

    You are a serf. Bitch, you live in Alsace. You are a peasant. You need to give your fuckin’ lord the grain. Your fucking children, you’ve had 15 children. You’ve never taken a bath. You’ve literally never. washed. your. penis. You’ve never used toilet paper. Motherfucker, you have worms. You are dying. You’ve had 40 children, 3 of them are alive. 2 of them are child soldiers in Africa. the other’s in prison. Oh, also you’ve got ED…technically. your dick doesn’t work. You’re 6 foot 6 inches.. 6 foot 6 inches of hard crusty nutsack crust. Your penis is buried under 3 feet of penis bone rabies pudding head shit glumpy maggots ringworm scabies wet dirt tight ass pussy syphillis marmaid penises stuck together by clitoris pussy removed dick cock sperm tail tail asshole asshole asshole anus anus toe monkey monkey bee bee coochie cucumberdick sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry, fucked up man eww eww eww it smells like horse manure and peasants out here man fuckin fuck that thought bye bye

    • MemesAreTheory [he/him, any]
      ·
      3 years ago

      Man I would be straight vibin if I had a cow, goat, pig, chicken, duck, goose, horse, donkey, dog, cat, and loving family including 3 wives and 2 husbands. This sounds like an idyllic poly post-apocalyptic homestead.

    • Catherine_Steward [she/her]
      ·
      3 years ago

      You’re a serf. You have a cow. You have a goat. You have a pig. You have a chicken. You have a duck. You have a goose. You have a horse. You have a donkey. You have a wife. You have a son. You have a daughter. You have a mother. You have a father. You have a brother. You have a sister. You have a grandfather. You have a grandmother. You have a nephew. You have a niece. You have a granddaughter. You have a grandson. You have a dog. You have a cat. You have a wife. You have a husband. You have a wife. You have a husband. You have a wife. You have a husband.

      Polyamorous serfs with massive families and tons of pets lets goooooo