easier to slice up and share, like a pizza. very proletarian imo
sharing a wide mcrib with the homies :powercry-1: :soviet-bashful: 🍔 :xok-og: :deeper-sadness:
You're taking issue with the peas but not the entire lobster and fish?!
Imagine pulling up somewhere with a pizza box, opening it, and it's just a 12 inch burger that's cut into triangle slices
I want to live in that world
Fancy burgers are tall because the burger format requires vertical stacking. You'd need fewer or thinner ingredients in order to have a short but wide burger. Fewer ingredients would mean a non fancy burger. You could also separate the ingredients into sections instead of stacking, but that would make the taste inconsistent across the burger.
So, this "wide burger" proposal is ignoring some major potential issues that can't easily be dismissed.
Who cares about fancy burgers? A good patty and some nice melty cheese is all you need.
How am I gonna persuade customers to come eat at my shitty hipster brewpub with such basic burgers???
You telling me you can't put peppers and onions on a wider surface? Doesn't that just mean you end up with more of the fancy ingredients per burger than the inferior stacked format? I can easily fit four full onion rings on a widescreen burger without compromising the height to width ratio, whereas fitting even two fancy onion rings on a vertically oriented burger makes taking a bite impossible without, you guessed it, smashing that shit down to a more appropriate configuration.
Edit: shit, I didn't even get to condiments. The short version is, I put barbecue sauce on a vertburg and I get a stream of sauce all over my fancy lad noshing bib. Slap that same sauce on wideburg and I get a mathematically perfect ratio of sauce to meat substitute (:im-vegan:).
I can easily fit four full onion rings on a widescreen burger without compromising the height to width ratio, whereas fitting even two fancy onion rings on a vertically oriented burger makes taking a bite impossible
This is an excellent point, which is thinner ingredients. The burger in the photo, for example, looks like it has some ingredients repeating in the stack, which imo is valuable burger space wasted on redundant flavors. I'm not necessarily against wide burgers, mind you, I just think it's not as simple as the meme here claims, but maybe it can be done with careful ingredient selection and expert-level burger design.
without, you guessed it, smashing that shit down to a more appropriate configuration.
What if we were to use some kind of burger compactor to compress a normally tall fancy burger into an extremely dense (but manageable) burger-like form?
What if we were to use some kind of burger compactor to compress a normally tall fancy burger into an extremely dense (but manageable) burger-like form?
You're now talking about some kind of Scooby-Doo style sandwich compression tech, and I am listening.
Maybe they could be like Cubanos, but uhhhhh... Burgers. Like this: https://youtu.be/FQLYDYmENrI
But a dedicated burger compactor would probably make this easier. I don't think this exists, so we'll have to invent one.
You two need to look up something called a shooter's sandwich. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Shooter%27s_sandwich
Dog, if I could get a vegan medianoche right now I'd be in 900 sorts of heaven. I will give up the fight on burger dimensions if we can just start a vegan cafetería cooperative and start pressing sandwiches yesterday.
Pitch session:
- Gommunism No Food
- Semper Fidel
- Havana Syndrome
- Smash Capitalism (and also sandwiches)
In 1984 animal farm burgers will be cut into slices.
Still think communism is good?
