"Wait. Is this guy seriously saying that I can’t get laid? 'Incredible. I will give you $5000 if you can get some poon tang before January 1st'? Do you have any idea who the fuck you’re talking to? When I got off Tinder because of the fucking Russian Civil War, St. Petersburg wept. Even ignoring the fact that I have a girlfriend, even if we’re just talking like randos, I’m two hours away right now from being inside someone else. I have two skills -it’s non-monogamy and speaking publicly, okay? Do some fucking research!"
"Wait. Is this guy seriously saying that I can’t get laid? 'Incredible. I will give you $5000 if you can get some poon tang before January 1st'? Do you have any idea who the fuck you’re talking to? When I got off Tinder because of the fucking Russian Civil War, St. Petersburg wept. Even ignoring the fact that I have a girlfriend, even if we’re just talking like randos, I’m two hours away right now from being inside someone else. I have two skills -it’s non-monogamy and speaking publicly, okay? Do some fucking research!"