A few days ago I ran into her in the library and we haven’t seen each other in like 12 months but her appearance changed and it kind of made me :reigen-sweat: We just talked and caught up, but a pressing question was in the back of my mind the whole time, which is the title of this post.
We usually just refer to each other as “cousins” when talking to other people because it was easier than explaining the family tree. No, I don’t plan on doing anything with her. We don’t have much in common and we grew up together so it’s weird even if she wasn’t related to anyone in my family. But, I am normal right?
that is a person and it is normal to find people attractive
also I'm assuming you didn't grow up with them
I didn’t grow up with her as in we live in the same house. But we saw each other and interacted with each other on a regular basis
Yeah, there's a whole theoretical mechanism where people who grow up together in close quarters tend not to be attracted to each other. This is presumably an evolved mechanism to avoid incest. But if you don't grow up together in close proximity it doesn't kick in.
Hi, I'm here from the Anti-EvoPsyBullshit Department to kindly tell you to shut up.
I thought the Westermarck Effect had some amount of empirical backing though?
No idea really, I'm not a psy medical professional, I just know that 99% of EvoPsy, especially if it comes from USA, is garbage.
Evolutionary psychology is bullshit yeah, but I'm pretty sure that one thing is real and anecdotally, I grew up with several very attractive people who are known primarily for being attractive and I don't find them at all attractive even though they don't look very different from those I do find attractive.
I'm gonna be Mr. Serious for a second. I hate to kink shame, but it's healthy to block certain feelings. There's a lot of sexual stuff that pops in my head where I go "ugh no" and try to move on, because it's not acceptable.
Hot take: The consequences of contemporary porn and super-popular George Martin's Westeros fantasies.
My brother always "joked" about our cousins being hot so I think you're in the clear
a website for crushing on your cousin
Edit: idk if weird, everyone knows someone tbh. Like that girl in drama class.
That kind of cousin (well in this case, cousin of a cousin... once removed? Idk) attraction is normal, or at least not too outside the realm of normality to be worried about, unless it starts to affect your family dynamic. Chalk it down to the human brain being weird
I was recently trying to find a better word for cousin of cousin and I haven't been able to
I think "once removed' is used for someone who is higher up generation wise in the family tree. So your first cousin shares a grand parent with you, but a first cousin once removed shares a great-grandparent with you and is in the generation of your parents. So your parent's first cousin.
I don't think there's a technical word since they wouldn't belong to your family tree, at least from a consanguinity perspective. As you say, your first cousin shares at least a grandparent with you. However, if (for instance) their mother is a sibling of one of your parents but their father is not (one would hope), their paternal cousins have no more genetic relation to you than any random person on the street. And of course, their maternal first cousins are the same as your first cousins.
Cutesy name I saw for it is "cousin-in-law" which does capture the difference.
Uhhh, let me be clear. I do not condone inappropriate familial relations.
Its not wierd to find her atractive. I think someone in your situation once calculated the optimal pairing taking into consideration inclusive fitnes and inbreeding defects and it was secon cousins once removed.
That being said keep your ecences to yorself at all times.
I have determined by your careless use of pronouns that in fact no, this is bad, you are awful, this is wrong, and you should be banned. And this post and every post should be removed from the site
Depends what you mean. I think my sister is a conventionally attractive woman. I can see that since I have eyes. Doesnt mean I have any interest in her sexually. Now if you have any "feelings" the topic gets a whole lot more complicated. Simply put there is nothing wrong with admitting a relative is "hot".
Honestly ? As long as you dont catch any feelings that seems ok. I wouldnt worry to much about it.
