Things my brain has viscerally associated with Christianity ever since I was a child:

-Boring saccharine 90s shit

-Donation sales that only sell mismatched too-large suits and denim jackets

-The feeling of having eaten too much ham on a hot day

-Feeling like you've been left at your weird aunt's house to follow her arcane rules for an afternoon

-Carpeted basements that are just...too quiet