It was my first trip since starting psych meds and leaving my abusive ex, and I'm really glad I did it. Lemon teked an eighth and had ego death to Spy Kids 3, realizing how I didn't have to hide myself to stay safe anymore. It was very liberating.

Edit: Adding to this because I'm on a desktop and it's a lot easier to type than my phone. Before I say anything, if you're somewhat new to tripping, some of the things I do would be extremely risky for your trip from what I've heard from others. For example, I LOVE looking in the mirror on psychedelics and it always makes my trip better. I love going into a dark unfinished basement that's completely empty and standing in it alone. I have not sold to a single other person that talks positively about either of those experiences, so some of my behaviors aren't worth copying unless you're REALLY comfortable in a trip.

I started off the trip with a walk to the local dollar store for a soda. Right when I planned on going for said walk, it started absolutely pouring. Well I got a nice new pink coat for $20 for the winter, so I popped it on and walked through the rain. At this point, I realized I was wearing a pair of shoes I was terrified of getting wet (suede pair I bought as a teenage sneakerhead) and just instantly accepted that my life would be better if I wasn't afraid of wearing my most comfortable pair of shoes in the rain. Normally this fear isn't a big deal as I hate walking in rain, but on shrooms I thought the rain sounded pleasant. Continued walking to the dollar store, extremely comfortable and dry in my cute coat, and bought a can of Fanta. I'll be real with y'all, whenever I'm toasted, cans of soda just taste so much better. They're one of the things I treat myself with now that I'm not drinking. Anyways, walk back to the apartment and my roommates ask a fantastic question. "Do you want to watch Spy Kids 3?". I instantly cackled and said yes. And honestly? The CGI was so fucking trippy, I didn't expect it to be that fucking crazy. We couldn't stop laughing for the first 20 mintues of it. 10/10 shroom movie. At some point, I got wrapped up in the last time I had relapsed on alcohol, and how it was completely incompatible with who I want to be as a person. Went out to smoke a cigarrette and try to ground myself in the rain, but it didn't quite work. My brain was set on the fact that I need to stop drinking forever, and I need to make it as hard as possible to keep drinking. The effect of this was I went up to the GM at work today and asked her to refuse to serve me alcohol. She thought it was cool that I was being honest with her. I get an employee discount on alcohol at work, and they have some of my favorites on tap. It's a dangerous combination, and I've slipped back into this more than I'd like to admit. But they literally won't serve me alcohol anymore, and that's so much stress off my shoulders.

After I got out of that thought loop, I fully started disintegrating to Spy Kids 3. Blame the shrooms, or the 45 percent THC joints my plug sent over with the shrooms, but I fully experienced ego death for the first time I can actually remember it. I know I've hit it before, but in the past I was too fucked up on other drugs to really remember it. I fully forgot that I was who I was for a second. I remembered me and for a second felt insecure. I'm the big drug dealer whose absolutely tweaking off some shrooms, I can't handle my shit. Then I forgot that that person was me. I realized that if I were around that person, I wouldn't be judging them for their extreme reaction to shrooms. They have schizophrenia so they are definitely tweaking, but they haven't been mean, they haven't made the space uncomfortable, they're having productive thoughts about how to ensure they never drink again. That's a good thing. Once I reintegrated, it was right at the end of Spy Kids 3, and the ending just made me laugh super hard for a while.

Then I watched my roommate play Fallout New Vegas (they're trans and have never played it before, I'm shocked) while I did some dabs and journaling. The body load was more than I was expecting with a lemon tekked trip. I ended up taking some kratom at some point, and I kinda regret that as I think it ended up killing the trip in the later stages and made it a lot shorter. However kratom definitely helped with my tweaky body movement and neck pain. Overall, it was a really fantastic trip, and I'm glad I did it