I definitely wanted to get sober. I think most people who say they want to get sober are telling the truth. It's just very, very hard to accomplish. There's a lot of immediate suffering for what's hopefully a long term payoff - and that's the exact opposite of the addiction mindset, you know?

So I kept trying, and eventually succeeded. I definitely used again after the worst period (which you can only identify in retrospect). I learned a little each attempt and the final one was a lucky combination and I had a shred of hope for the future.

Which is why I really think giving addicts resources, support, and hope is a better bet than the framing that negative things are happening and will keep happening until they get sober. (And I'm not saying it's a dichotomy and you're all about the latter).

And of course you can and should only help in the ways that are safe and healthy for you. It's so common for recovered addicts to want to work with other addicts but it has its dangers too, which we must stay vigilant about. Not helping because it's unhealthy for you is a good enough reason all in its own! It's independent from the question of whether or would help or hurt the addict.