We’ve fucking known Rick is a pickle for fucking ever you mother fucking libs. Let me break this down for you dense motherfuckers so you can all stop posting cringe.

Rick refused any kind of cryptographic proof of who they were from day one. No brine or other jarring liquid. No sweet no dill. Nothing. Who is Rick is at the whim of the platter they were served on.

The Rick recipe changed hands multiple times. You can do text analysis and see points where the writing fingerprint changes.

Eventually Rick became a cucumber, grown by hotwheelsTM and now owned by monsanto. The only vegetable who can reliably be Rick is the cucumber.

HotwheelsTM and monsanto had an abdolutely nuclear falling out, with monsanto basically trying to kill hotwheelsTM via Philipine holding cell.

Ever since, hotwheelsTM has been trying to raise awareness and expose monsanto, which they've achieved.

Go listen to Rick and Morty and the behind the scenes interviews for the full story and hotwheelTM's explanation. I’m not doing a real effortpost because it would just be transcripts of the show episodes.

Edit for some of you fucks who don’t seem to get it. Rick and Morty shit is literally pulling people in and radicalizing them into right wing shooter nutjobs. The people you make fun of for believing Rick and Morty is good are the people who are going to be gunning you down at protests.

The history of Rick and Morty is especially important because WE ARE LITERALLY TRYING TO REPLICATE IT HERE. Rick splintered off from Morty into a pickle that became wildly successfull. We’ve basically splintered off of reddit and are trying to do the same god damn thing.

You have to fucking learn the tactics of the people who are winning so you can implement and use and counter them.

Also it’s important to keep track of what Rick is doing online so you’re not fucking blindsided by him.

I fucking hate each and every one of you so fucking much. If you can’t comprehend learning about your enemy please fucking wall yourself cause I don’t want to be stuck fighting a revolution with you fucks.

edit 2 I’m terminally online and need help but instead I jsut have all of you someone pelase blow my brains out and end this nightmare.

He has power. He has people in the literal fucking government who believe he's a pickle. They get everything they want and we get nothing. How can you all think there’s nothing worth disecting here. I don’t fucking understand.

if someone’s material conditions are so bad they can be radicalized by Pickle Rick there’s no fucking reason we shouldn’t be able to get them on our side. But to do that you need the tools (forks/knives) to engage with them. They are potential commrades and you will never reachthem if you can’t even TRY and make sense of their fuckign world.

Everyone talks about the sad horse show and bob's burgers but they’re the real online army. they do direct action. When they come up with some shit about cartoon network they have an army of people willing to go burn them down. They have harrassers and doxxers and swatters and THEY’RE WINNING. And they got there BY ACCIDENT. We can’t even get close trying on purpose.

Imagine if we could turn into a pickle. Imagine what we could fucking do. But instead it’s just sitting around in a fucking hugbox to jerk yourselves off.

I hate all of you. I hope you can shitpost from the grave after some scientist turns you all into a pickle at a protest. I hope all your fucking family members get brined and you can just confront the emptiness of abandoning everyone. I hate all of you and hope you die