Like if you've known me for a while and you still misgender me, it's something I'm doing probably

I don't think this is true. It's well within the realm of possibility that it's on them, and you're behavior has little to do with it.

If it's happening all the time, I'm obviously just coming off as masc in a way that is undeniable

Now this... I mean, I can't deny that. I've got a manly face, and there's no way I'm ever going to pass. I'm not ever going to practice a really girly voice either because I don't want one.

But, like, if my friends use this to invalidate my gender identity, then, uh, they won't be my friends anymore lol. If people aren't going to believe me because I act or look a certain way, then they can fuck off.

I know this is super generic advice, but it's all I got. Sometimes my wife still dead names me out of habit, and she apologizes after, but then I think "Oh, you're just always going to see me that way, huh." So, I know where you're coming from. But like... I also don't want to perform femininity in a way that I don't like just to try to get cis people to acknowledge me.

I basically know where I want to be, I know that if I could choose i would have been a cis woman, I want to be a woman. But I don't feel like a woman.

Just stay the course, girl