set your goddamn pronouns, i'm asking you as a trans person. Getting misgendered, even online, can be really painful to someone experiencing gender dysphoria. Help your comrades out by normalizing the act of publicly displaying your pronouns, it makes us feel like we don't stick out as TRANS for putting pronouns on display and makes us feel safer, you know, kinda like how a nice inclusive community should feel?

Don't care/worried it will compromise opsec somehow? Simply pick the "any" pronoun, comrade! There are dozens of us!

BTW there is no reasonable "other side" to this issue, you either are willing to spend 1 second setting your pronouns to help your marginalized comrades OR you're an asshole who is putting their own feelings first over others :)

Edit: sincere thank you to the people who listened and set their pronouns! It really does make us trans people who care about this sort of thing feel safer and more accepted :)

  • Zuzak [fae/faer, she/her]
    10·
    4 years ago

    Why on earth would you stick out as trans for publically displaying your pronouns? Plenty of cis people list their pronouns, not out of a sign of solidarity, but because they don't want to be misgendered either. So I'm not going to assume anyone's trans because they list their pronouns in the first place.

    You are not an asshole if you put your own feelings before those of others when it comes to how you choose to identify yourself. And you are not transphobic just because you like they anonymity of the internet, where nobody knows anything about your gender and you don't have to worry about choosing how to present.

    That is the other side to this, and the reason why this struggle session sucks. It is not transphobic to not announce your pronouns to everyone you meet.

    • Gay_Wrath [fae/faer]
      5·
      4 years ago

      Why on earth would you stick out as trans for publically displaying your pronouns? Plenty of cis people list their pronouns

      this wasn't originally the case :) especially for places like twitter where you have a profile pic

      You are not an asshole if you put your own feelings before those of others

      ?

      And you are not transphobic just because you like they anonymity of the internet

      that's what the any pronoun is for tho

      It is not transphobic to not announce your pronouns to everyone you meet.

      but that's not what this is or comparable to that at all. also if there is a norm of saying your pronouns while introducing yourself and you REFUSE, especially in a queer place, you ARE being transphobic

      • Zuzak [fae/faer, she/her]
        3·
        4 years ago

        this wasn’t originally the case :) especially for places like twitter where you have a profile pic

        It was always the case here, because we don't have profile pics.

        You are not an asshole if you put your own feelings before those of others

        ?

        Yes? That shouldn't be a question. If I put other people's feelings before my own I'd identify as cis rather than NB, because oh no what if it makes them uncomfortable? When it comes to your own identity and presentation, you have every right to put yourself before others.

        that’s what the any pronoun is for tho

        I don't see how that's any different from just not listing it. What exactly does that accomplish?

        but that’s not what this is or comparable to that at all. also if there is a norm of saying your pronouns while introducing yourself and you REFUSE, especially in a queer place, you ARE being transphobic

        I don't really know how to respond to this. If saying, "Sorry, I haven't figured it out yet" or "I don't care, you can just call me whatever" is transphobic, then call me a transphobe, I guess. Personally, I think that's ridiculous. I think I should be able to present or not present how I choose and identify or not identify how i choose and that's none of your business. Am I mistaken?