In like a thick new jersey accent:

If you want my balls you gotta talk to my wife i don't know where she keeps 'em

Not stealing when they are given freely. Take note this is what real mutual aid looks like

You could have just asked.

Jokes on you I have no ass hank hill style

Just don't glue them together again, please.

Jokes on you, now you have IBS!

I do miss the balls though

Good, take them

I want to be smooth and free of protrusion

My dick can stay though, I like being able to aim my pee

You may steal my balls... you may steal my ass... but you'll never dogs my bathtub.

Real andy griffiths shit

you can take my ass when you pry it from my cold dead hands

fine, I wasn't using them anyway

Orchiectomypilled eunuchmaxxing

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I already have no ass :(

You’ll have to ask my wife where she keeps them.