Bottom (and I do mean BOTTOM) text.
♪Look in my ass! What do ya see? The Cult of Colonoscopy!♪
Do you know what they stuck up your butt? I'm a machinist who makes dozens of different components, and some of them go into machines designed for exploring people's butts. I'm basically cranking out ass pennies on a lathe over here.
They didn't show me their tool(s) prior to the violation session. Stuck me with an IV, dropped in some good drugs, woke me up and now I'm dropping red deuces.
I hope it was good for them.
I always worry that in some operating room somewhere, the doctors will have one of those Mission Impossible worm cameras stuck 3 feet up someone's ass, then the mechanisms will jam up because I fucked up a gear.
You seem competent. I hope you were on the ass camera assembly line of my equipment.
lord knows what happens on the assembly line (i don't know because we just make a handful of components. Hell, most of the time the only thing I see is a blueprint for one part and I have no idea what the mating parts look like, let alone the machine. Talk about alienation of labor).
Yes. I'd share them but then the Feds would know what my lower intestine looks like.
I'm not ready to doxx myself.
fellow colonoscopy bro
it's like we're spiritually connected through our assholes
SuTabs
omg tablets? i better be allowed to do this when i have to get mine but i think being high risk for colon cancer(lynch syndrome) they might want me to do the nasty juice.
I mean, it all ends up coming out in a similar fashion so I think the difference is nominal. But this is my first rodeo so I'm no expert.
I know I'm half kidding around, but I'm sorry you have to go through this. This was not a fun experience for me, minus getting knocked out. That shit was awesome.
yea few people my age are getting a colonoscopy every 2 years. so far they've found a polyp and im not even 40 years old yet. It used to be said that colonoscopies should start for everyone at 50, but it's probably more like 40 now. Like at least get your first one at 40. Colon cancer is crazy rampant in my family but it was found through genetic testing.
when i did my colonoscopies i had to drink a liter of some of the most absolutely fucking awful liquid ever. imagine sprite, but it's got a salty taste
How much pain? And how far in did they go?
I don't know why I want to ask these questions. I feel dirty already.
How far? Don't know.
The procedure doesn't hurt because they knock you the fuck out and it's an amazing trip. But the 24 hours leading up to it is pretty intense with the laxative. You won't sleep. It's hard to sit or get comfortable. And you will be on the throne ALOT.
Should I grab a snack on the way home from work? Currently on train.
Why didn't you do the cologard thing where you put your poop in a box and mail it instead
im high risk(Lynch syndrome) and can't do that.
Also: "Cologuard only detects large precancerous polyps 42% of the time. A colonoscopy detects the same polyps 95% of the time and they are removed during the same procedure."
If you want it done right, get the colonoscopy.
Then someone could just take the Cologard six times in a row and the results would be even MORE accurate than a colonoscopy :galaxy-brain:
I put my poop in a box and mail it to random doctors out of the phone book just for fun, I'm so protected
No issues. They removed a polyp but they said it looked benign. I'm assuming the removal process is why I have a minor burning under my belly button but above Big Jim and the Twins. Nothing terrible, though.
