I've been a member of this community for about 3 years. in that time, I've gone from lib, through DSA, to something I'm comfortable calling a communist organizer. I discovered I was trans in this space and I have transitioned while posting and, in truth, I will always be fond of it for that reason. in my time here, I've made it a point to be open and share of myself as much as I can, partially because an open posture and profile helps my organizing, partially because I hate alienation, and partially in an effort to try and change this space into something welcoming for people of all genders, sexualities, races, and of differing ability. my hope has always been that by sharing freely of myself, I'd encourage others to do the same. it's in that spirit of openness that I offer this criticism of the userbase - as a whole and without reference to any particular individuals - and an explanation of why I will not be returning to this space. I encourage you all to look through my post history and attempt to understand who I am before you respond with vitriol - I have in fact done my best to make it as easy as possible.

it's ironic, I think, that what finally broke me wasn't the waves of transphobia - the truly nasty, or the insidious and subtle - that have, in the months since our pronouns struggle sessions, found their way into my inbox, the gaslighting over whether it was happening, or even the weird, harassing messages from chuds who decided I was to blame for their bans. it wasn't even the omnipresent misogyny and racism that makes this space so toxic for non-male and non-white users. nope, what broke me was two-fold.

first, the especially cishet white male audience here struggles with criticism. we laugh easily at reddit libs being blatantly racist or sexist but the community as a whole bristles at the notion that they might have work to do.

PSA: we have not won liberation. the hegemonic culture is extremely bigoted on so many axes. even if you spend a lifetime doing hard, careful introspection to root bigotry out of your hearts and minds, the very air you breathe instills it back within you. it's not a personal slight to be told you've fucked up.

in organizing spaces, we hold to a notion of accountability that attempts to raise up the voices of those harmed, especially marginalized people, in order to ensure that hegemonic cultural influences do not infiltrate our spaces and drive away the very people whose liberation we fight for - the American working class is far browner and queerer than the class reductionists pretend and to ignore those issues as predominantly cishet white male organizers, stepping into their spaces is to alienate them from the word go. this notion is utterly foreign to most of the userbase here and it leads to astonishing and bewildering defensiveness.

it is not the job of marginalized people to do emotional labor to make you okay with the fact that you've hurt them. the assumption that you are owed that labor is part of the system of oppression that makes life miserable for people you call comrade. it's the same notion as when a loved one informs you that you've hurt them - if you make it their problem to make you feel better about the fact, you're being an asshole. deal with the hurt you've caused, then deal with the feelings about yourself that having hurt someone causes within you.

this is such a core issue on this site and I've watched it drive away so many good comrades - especially, I've personally noticed, queer people, women, and people of color. I am certain that other marginalized identities are similarly driven away from this place.

please, stop defending this behavior.

please, stop engaging in it.

choose reflection, not defensiveness. you will not be made less. you will, in fact, become so much richer for the experiences and relationships that this space has the potential to foster, but that it cannot for the omnipresent toxicity.

on a more personal note, I'm also deeply frustrated with a space filled with apparent leftists that does so little organizing or any actual praxis. what does it mean to profess left politics and to engage in purely symbolic action. there is so much good and important work to be done. not all of it requires you to know and talk to people. it merely asks that you attempt to solve the problems that you yourself encounter and to share that work with as many others.

we talk endlessly about theory and which tendency is right - but just two days ago I posted a thread to collect the most useful works and so few found themselves able to contribute. someone commented to me that they thought it was the best thread they'd seen here but I was honestly disappointed. over more than a day, less than 10 users managed to even look through this site for resources to post. when I think what might have been... but we each expect someone else to do the work.

that alone would merely be irritating. but to follow that with incessant armchair speculation about the work others should do... I could never convince actual organizers to spend any time here. we joke about every one here being libs but what's the difference? what use our radicalization if all we can do is post about what other people do?

no one is coming to liberate you. we have to build the better world we claim to want. we are the only ones who can do it. it only gets done one brick at a time.

if this post offends you, whatever. I'm not reading the replies so vent all your rage.

if, on the other hand, this speaks to you, if you'd like ideas for necessary work that needs to get done, that would help real people, reach out to me on matrix. you can find me at @therivercass:chapo.chat. I am never without a list of a million different things that would make actual people's lives a little easier but that I will never have the time to get to. I promise, I only bite jackasses.

(apologies in advance to anyone that reaches out - my responses this week will be slow.)

      • OgdenTO [he/him]
        ·
        4 years ago

        I for one tend to ignore feature posts if I don't understand the title (should I apologize?)

        But this one i remember - I didn't participate, 1 because I'm not in the US and though there are many Canadian comrades here I felt I would be an interloper and 2 i did not know what a mass line is so I didn't even open it.

        Does that make me a bad chapo user?

          • OgdenTO [he/him]
            ·
            4 years ago

            Well ok good then.

            One good thing is I now know what a mass line is.

            But really, a lack of participation in one post is hardly a full representation of the irl actions that the users are doing. I know that Cass won't see this, but the really online people who would interact with a single post are not the people who are doing the most in the real world. Relying on a single post for real action is self defeating - the people most likely to miss it are the ones who are probably most active outside.

      • qublics [they/them,she/her]
        ·
        4 years ago

        maybe worth checking relative number of page views of https://hexbear.net/c/main/ versus https://hexbear.net/