Yes we're late >.>
Hang out. Chat. Talk about what's going on. Have fun :3
Ok so either I'm having a manic episode or the brain fog I've lived with my entire life is kinda lifting about 3 months into HRT? Honestly I feel like I can actually engage with my work and not barely tread water, and I have actual confidence? I'm not even out at work. It's kinda something I never thought would happen but it seems to be happening??!?
Yo I'm like 2 months in as well and I've been more productive and confident than I've felt in years, I'm not even out at work either. I guess I was just depressed.
When I first started transitioning that exact feeling was the number one benefit I told people about. Like the engines running on new oil and it's running so smooth now
I've heard trans people talk about it before bit tbh I also was very much in the thought process of "This will not just fix your life or be a magic drug. It will just make me grow boobs basically" but like I gotta say it's just way better than I ever could have expected
This will not just fix your life or be a magic drug
That’s what I’ve been telling myself for a while now. I’ve been avoiding estrogen because of constraints in my life. Are you saying this isn’t the whole picture?
estrogen isn't for everyone but personally it's been a lifesaver. i feel unbelievably better about everything
What I'm saying is that, I had heard that estrogen was like life changing and changed many different parts of your life. But from other people, I heard it just made them grow boobs basically. I aired on the side of caution and just expected it to basically make me grow boobs and stuff.
Frankly I've been very pleasantly suprised. It's really life changing for me. Like I can exist in society. I can literally focus at work which I never expected to happen. I'm not even out there yet. I feel like where in the past I would jsut become depressed and anxious and really miserable about so many things I'm just... not. Like I feel good. It's really wild. I've never felt this way
I wouldn't say it's fixed my life cuz I got all kinds of problems. But it is kinda magic and I feel mentally sharper and more in touch with my emotions and I've not been on it long
congrats! it hurts, but it's a very short pain and the results are super good in my experience. they take time though, you won't notice much of anything after the first session
Thanks! I really hope I have good results, but the nurse did warn me it could go either way with my hair color. I'm a redhead, but more brown-ish, auburn red, so it's apparently hard to say if my hairs have enough of the right type of melanin for the laser to be effective or not.
I need to actually learn how to do eye shadow instead of saying I will every few months
Is really fun, and just one of those things that just like clicks and begins to make sense at one point. For a while, I was like how tf are these people blending?
Eyeshadow is actually kinda easy, it's the eyeliner that still fucks with me. The trick for basic eyeshadow is mostly to apply a good foundation and to use brighter highlight colors on the inside (at the corner of your eye that's next to the nose) and move to darker shades as you go up and outwards. This'll make the eye appear larger. The rest is mostly experimenting with color combinations and different brushes, which is honestly real fun if you have a few nice palettes. Blending can be a bit tricky, but that gets easier over time.
Hung out with one of my partners tonight. Found out they've been exploring some gender stuff a bit but insist "I don't have dysphoria so I'm not trans." Which, not how that works, but fair, you don't have to be trans to play with gender. Then I start thinking back through our relationship and I'm like "oh, this is all textbook trans shit... How did I not realize this earlier?!"
And now I'm just like, I guess I gotta pretend I don't know what's going on here for however long while they figure stuff out when all I wanna do is laugh maniacally and be like "WELCOME TO THE CLUB"
Of course I would never do that. But like, come on.
I'm coming to the realization that I have no idea how to dress myself.
Yeah its definitely a skill, but it's such a fun process. It's all about figuring out what fits on your body. Being AMAB I am quite limited honestly. Idk what you look like honestly but like, flared jeans do a lot... imo. Also thrift stores are your friend
Idk why but for me, they look so fem. Nothing really matches up, especially ones that are very tight around the thighs and quite loose around the ankles. I love them. Also make sure they're high waisted. (High waisted jeans accentuate the hips that don't exist on me lol)
Yeah I don't have curves so I'll have to give high waisted flared jeans a try. My body shape is about as rectangular as it gets.
I think what it does is basically just adds curviness to your body. If you're in the US they sell some at target that are p good. And yeah, idk about you but I have the inverted triangle body shape so there's a lot of like, trying to hide that in my clothing. I use wraps, shawls, pashminas to cover my shoulders and stuff so as to mask the shape of my body
Skill issue, just wear a dress and then everyone thinks you're fancy for doing no effort
I've dressed in blue jeans and band tee shirts for decades. Hahaha so outside of that, I'm lost. But I'm learning!
i like layering, seeing what shirts go well with a given jacket. good weather for it, if your in the northern hemisphere
The past couple of days it's felt like my brain was in a pinball machine, rapidly bouncing between "I want nothing more than to unalive myself right now" and "wow I haven't felt this good in a while".
IDK if anyone is
doom scrollingFollowing the Nex Benedict case as closely as I am, but earlier today, the preliminary police autopsy allegedly found that Nex's death was not caused by the head trauma they received the day prior, during the incident where they were beaten.Now I'm not a medical professional, so I could be really off base here, but.... That sounds like a load of shit to me. What else could it have been?
i started playing final fantasy 14, and i wanted to add a mod so my character would have top surgery scars. but i couldn't find any mods for editting the vanilla body texture to have that, so i basically had to download 2 gb worth of mods just for top surgery scars.
but i mean it worked so i guess it's fine
Hiii, everyone how are you all doing. Hopefully well!!! 🩵🩷🤍🩷🩵
Trans Rescue seems to be looking for people to help make adverts
If you have some spare time over the next 6 weeks and have #voiceacting, #audio editing, #video editing, video production, #illustration, #3D graphics, writing, or similar skills and would be up for helping us help #trans Americans, please drop us a line at annie@transrescue.org We're hoping to produce a lot of content over the next few months.
Plz use the link or comment to bump this. I'm not affiliated with them and can't answer questions.
Biweekly. I've been doing it for almost a year, but it feels like my body spins the roulette wheel every time. Sometimes I'm so nervous my hands shake. Sometimes it feels like the needle (21 gauge) doesn't want to go in, even though I feel like I'm applying the same amount of force and coming straight down. Sometimes the estradiol will seep out of the injection site after leaving the needle in for a few seconds after I inject and I slowly remove the needle. Sometimes it's absolutely fine and I feel amazing afterwards.
Oh wow yeah biweekly is not a lot. That's what my doctor prescribed bur I b just skipped to doing once every 5 days and it's been perfect.
Took me an hour and a half to muster the courage to do my first injection. Now I look forward to it when it comes up.
injections aren't bad! i had a panic attack doing my first one but after that it's been fine
don't freak out if you bleed like a stuck pig btw, just make a reminder not to stab that area again
i recommend looking up YouTube videos on the injection BUT ALSO the drawing up process if you haven't already. there's a specific technique to getting the needle into the bottle without shooting chunks of rubber into it
You get used to them. My top tip, tap around the area you're injecting for a spot with fewer nerve endings. You'll feel it less, or if you're lucky, not at all.
My hormone-doctor meeting was delayed till the middle of march. Very unhappy that this is the case, but happy that I have such clear feelings about it.
I have talked with a local transwoman about hormones and she recommended hormone patches(need to be exchanged every 3.5 days). She said that they go directly into the bloodstream, as opposed to pills, and are less of a bother than injections. They are also paid by insurance here(injections are not) I never see them talked about online, are they uncommon in the anglophone world?
My mother has been proposing female names for me, now that I am out to her. It's appreciated, I am still hesitant to commit to one.
doctors here generally want to prescribe pills and be done with it. i think it's usually possible to get patches but you need to know and ask
Injections aren't covered?! Kinda crazy imo. That's like, THE way to take hormones imo. I've heard good things about patches
in germamy injections dont even exist. The only doable way to get them is the gray market.
What the hell??? I wonder why. To me they are so easy and consistent.
couldn't find any reason.
the prefered way here is gel or pills. gel is pretty great from what i've heard. Pills are kinda ugh. I have to take pills though because of a skin condition.
I wonder why.
There was just one company that offered them and they went bankrupt. Because trans women are such a small market and estradiole is mostly produced for menopausal cis women who do fine with gels and do not need the high monotherapy doses that benefit the most from injections, nobody has bothered going through the approval process for a new injectable product.
So much for "transgender ideology is a big pharma conspiracy".
I am hearing very different stuff on injections, some people hate them and find them bothersome, and often I hear the opposite. I guess it is personal preference and comfort with needles?
Yeah I mean I don't like the needles part. But I also did not want T blockers. I just wanted to do monotherapy and injections are the best for that as far as I understand. That being said also injections really don't hurt or anything, it's just a little weird stabbing yourself with a pointy object
They do exist if you find a pharmacy that custom makes them for you. Let's not talk about the price, though. I hear that they're easier available in Hamburg because a trans celebrity there has them produced in bulk so that they're more affordable. I wonder if regional crowdfunders would be a possibility, it's really about scale with this stuff.
You don't have to commit to a name right away, it's ok to try them out. I ended up sticking with my first pick because it just felt lived-in and authentic after half a year or so, but i know a lot of people who've switched things around a bit.
Tw: Death/Doomerism
The murder of Nex Benedict is really getting to me. It's really caused me to reckon with all the compartmentalizing I've done for all trans death for so long. Like I've said "their death is tragic but we're dying to create a better world for the future". But Nex's death doesn't do that, their death is going to drive more young people to stay in the closet, and the way the authorities are handling it, it feels like that's the point. Im beginning to lose hope for a better future. I know that's how they win but they are factually winning. Idk, just venting. I can't stop crying all the time.
Sure hope this vendor reaches out to me about shipping my meds soon. This is slightly longer than she has taken to get me tracking in the past, so clearly I should catastrophize things.
